Finding one small blessing each day.

When I grow up May 2, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — hiddenblessing @ 9:51 pm
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Inspiring Quote on wall @Starbucks
Image found at http://www.flickr.com/photos/37676753@N08/


Do you ever feel like everything around you is just changing? I have been feeling these changes rolling over me like an ocean wave, and slowly but surely everything has been changing. All for the better, but it’s just so fascinating to realize. I think back about what I was thinking about and focused on just a mere few months ago, and it seems like everything has changed.

It started with Braden and Ronan. Braden, the sweet boy I’ve talked about whose race I went to a few weeks ago. And Ronan, whose mom’s blog inspired me to start this very one you are reading right now. Both of these innocent, darling children are fighting cancer right now and Braden is doing well right now. Ronan is not. I cry just reading his mom’s blog. It devastates me, floors me, and breaks my heart. I am disgusted that childhood cancers are not given more attention, more money, more notice. How are these babies dying every FOURTEEN HOURS and we haven’t done more? We can put a man on the moon, we can build entire fake cities to train our militaries, we can have FIFTY MILLION VOTERS on one night of American Idol, but we can only come up with two drugs to treat pediatric cancers in the last twenty years??? What if every single one of those voters donated one dollar to childhood cancer research, for just one night? In a matter of three hours, we would have fifty MILLION DOLLARS.

Ok, enough about that. I’m getting off subject. So these changes with me started with these two boys. I started following their stories, then I started commenting, and then I started this blog. And then I started volunteering, and then I quit smoking. And now I’ve started running. And then finally, I enrolled at a community college to take one class… one class towards my dream someday of being a nurse.

I’ve started researching schools, and realizing that my GPA all those years ago in college – when graduation was the only thing on my mind, not how successfully I got there – may actually prevent me from getting accepted into a university. That saddens me. I am an entirely different woman than I was when I was in college. I have zero doubt that my grades will be astronomically better now than they were then. The reasons for this are many; I understand how expensive it is. I also understand what it means to feel passionate about what I’m doing, and why. And I’m old enough now to actually KNOW what I want to be when I grow up.

I found out today that the students that get accepted into the program I am interested in have a typical GPA of 3.7. This means all A’s in college, with an occasional B thrown in. This means ZERO C’s and most certainly not that D that I got in Sign Language but didn’t bother to retake because I was so mad that I had a D in the first place. I could accept this at face value and move on, but I won’t. It might mean that I can’t get into THAT school, but it doesn’t change a thing. Because I have wanted to be a nurse, overwhelmingly so, for most of my adult life, and this desire strikes me every few years or so. But now I’ve realized the time has come to consider actually doing something about it, no matter how many years it might take me to do it. Because children like Ronan don’t have my whole lifetime to wait for help. So Chemistry 121, here I come. Wish me luck, my friends. I am filled with such HOPE and excitement about this!

Goodnight, friends. I hope that you are listening to your dreams tonight, and tomorrow, you have enough courage to do something about them. GPA’s be damned. I will be an amazing nurse someday.